St. Francis, Let Me Buy You a Drink
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by Stephen Trout
Recently my friend Brian, worship leader at Kaleo and all-around cool dude, imagined what it would be like to do coffee (or Caramel Macchiatos, as he prefers) with John Newton, hymn writer of the classic Amazing Grace. (You can “listen in” on his conversation with the 18th century former slave trader at Semperreformanda records
I remembered this the other day when during a counseling session, I quoted my favorite line from the famous “Prayer of St. Francis” (See entire prayer below.) The line goes, Grant that I might not so much seek to be consoled, as to console; to be understood, as to understand; to be loved, as to love; for it is in giving that we receive…” I began to wonder what it would be like to have “St. Frank” (can I call him Frank?) counsel me in a short conversation, and then go out for drinks…(of course, he’d probably insist on buying. He’s just that kind of guy!)
Lord, make me an instrument of Thy peace;
where there is hatred, let me sow love;
where there is injury, pardon;
where there is doubt, faith;
where there is despair, hope;
where there is darkness, light;
and where there is sadness, joy.
O Divine Master,
grant that I may not so much seek to be consoled as to console;
to be understood, as to understand;
to be loved, as to love;
for it is in giving that we receive,
it is in pardoning that we are pardoned,
and it is in dying that we are born to Eternal Life.
Amen.
Frank: “I wrote that prayer out of a deep sense that God wanted me to– to use your current jargon- “get off myself.”
ST: “So that is my main problem? Self?”
Frank: “Well, if you’re like the rest of us, yes.”
ST: “Gee, you don’t pull any punches!”
Frank: “Frankly, my friend, we were made for better things than to be wrapped up in self. You were made for relationship with God Himself. And then, recognizing that, you were made for your neighbor.” I believe this failure contributes to much of your current depression. Even Freud got that notion at one point.”
ST: “Wow, I don’t love my neighbor as I should, that’s for sure.”
Frank: “Nor did I. That’s why I wrote the prayer. We need God to do a divine work in our hearts, which are continually “bent inward” on self. For example, consider a conflict with someone with whom you are in relationship, maybe a friend. You may have a very valid point of how they hurt you. And you want to prove it to them with everything you can muster, so that “you are understood.” But have you considered that in your desire to be “right,” you may be desiring to worship your “rightness,” instead of loving the other person - even, as Paul said, being willing to be wronged, or defrauded (I Corinthians 6:7)?”
ST: (laughing) “No, I’ve never had that problem.”
Frank: “Sure.”
ST: “Ok, I see, its very subtle isn’t it?”
Frank: “Oh yes, especially when you believe you are defending a good thing. (Most of us don’t take pains to defend an evil thing after all!)”
ST: “But what if I truly am a victim?”
Frank: “Of course you are, we all are victims…but we are also victimizers, especially when our responses to being wronged become less like I Corinthians 13 and more like Kill Bill…well, anyone who takes revenge and wants to “even the score.” Hence the prayer, …it is in dying that we are born to eternal life.”
ST: “I thought that was about Jesus.”
Frank: “Of course it is. If you died with Him – on the cross – then you have died to sin’s slavery. Read Romans 6, its all there. But you and I still have much pride, and it springs up like a prairie dog at a carnival, whenever you least expect.”
ST: “Wow, you use such current metaphors!”
Frank: (Smiling) “Ahh, you are trying to elicit my pride? But thank-you anyway.”
ST: “So most of my problem is that I make myself the center of the universe (my universe)?”
Frank: “Yes, it takes much wisdom from God to see it sometimes, but it helps to ask your heart “what is it that I think I need most?” And much of the time it is a good desire elevated to the point of a need, or an idol. Its a worship disorder, you know.”
ST: “Which Is why I need Jesus, right? He must become more beautiful to me than my supposed need?”
Frank: “Exactly…and we will see it as we repent of our need to be in the center…in all of our individual circumstances.”
ST: “Wow, easier said than done!”
Frank & ST: “Hence, the prayer!”
ST: “Well, I’m sure you have much more that you could say, but since you’re in our century for just a few more hours today, can I buy you a drink?”
Frank: “Indeed…for it is in giving that we receive, you know!”
(Footnote: Curiously, part of what was once the site of St. Francis’ original 12th century abbey is now a brewery! St. Francis was apparently quite a drinker in his younger days, but after a serious illness caused him to think more deeply about his life, he probably gave up drinking. My imaginary conversation might be stretching it to say he’d have a beer, but who knows? Counseling can take place anywhere!)